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Why I'm still single.
Hot guy: Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Me: No, but I did scrap my knee when I crawled out of hell.
Hot guy: .................
Me: ...............
Hot guy: (turns around and runs away.)
Me: What's wrong with me?
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beyoncebeytwice:

i love how no matter how badly you fuck up benadryl cumquat’s name everyone on here still knows who ur talking about

(via emilymeow)

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I’ve learned so much while living in the wild for 72 hours. How little the way you look matters, that we have to preserve nature, that nothing should be taken for granted, how important creativity and inventiveness is and so many more things. I wanna do this again, many more times, make fires, cook simple meals and read.

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©